Sunday, February 24, 2008

I've decided to post some dedications for some of my really close friends or people who've had a particular influence on my life. Not sure why, but I suddenly had this idea of doing such a thing. Well I guess the next few posts will all be around the same idea? I just want to say a big thank you to everyone. Yups. Haha. Sounding a lil corny. Oh wells, I just want to do something for them and explain how these people actually made me a better person! =)

Okay let's see. I knew LerXian only in Sec1 during CO camp. But we weren't very close at that point in time cos I donno, not close? Haha. All I knew about him was that we was one of the best, if not the best young talent Singapore has. He was quiet, or at least I thought so because I wasn't that close to him. But somehow, I do remember him having to sleep on my sleeping bag cos he didn't bring his own. Haha. That was plainly, hilarious.

Well, we started to get close in sec3, after the juniors challenged us to a soccer match. Together with some other boys we formed our first seniors team. And so we played lots of matches together and won many of them, largely due to his abilities!! Haha (Eh if you're reading this you better smile ah.) Top corner, side-step, cross-overs, placement, Carlos-styled, you name it, he did it.

But what made me so impressed with him was his maturity. I'm not sure why but I always saw him as a big brother, not like he's very much older than I am! But somehow or rather, I always thought that Ler's smart and that he's able to see things from many different angles and give his own point of views. He always knows what to say and how to say it. And not to mention, he would always be there when you needed help. Countless of occasions when I needed help and he'd always be there, either to hear my cock or explain situations to me. Haha. So much so that I have nothing but praises for him in front of my mum. And guess what, my mum loves him and often repeats, "Eh boy ah! Must learn from LerXian hor!" Haha.

We've been keeping in contact with each other, especially since we started playing Maple together. You could see that he's different from others. Even though it's just pixels, but the sheer intention to share his wealth and items with you was good enough. Not many people do that, even though it's just pixels. Haha. We shared stories online, shared ideas and talked about many different topics.

This year was especially interesting. I kept going to him for help and never did he ever say no. That alone, really made him that great. Yups.

I don't think I'll regret knowing him. Yups. So here's to my best-friend, LerXian. Thank you so much for all your teachings and friendship. All 5 years plus of it!! Wow, time flies. LOL!!

All the best for your Hell Week =P

-js-

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Been through quite a bit of stuff. Guess the entire episode made me realise that I lost quite a bit of things.

Was going through the things that I've lost. I found out that I lost my ability to rattle things of with confidence. Was going through what happened back in RV when I participated in the Chinese Speaking competition. I guess, I'm no longer as confident. I'm not sure why. I guess this entire episode made me less confident of myself. Not sure why either. Maybe that person's right,
I really don't understand, even though I say I do. I guess only I know. But wait, even I don't know.

I've lost quite a bit of things. I've lost faith in lots of stuff. I've lost the courage to do or say things. I've lost my motivation. I've lost my goal. I've lost myself.

I'm lost.

-js-